Its just three weeks today since we left Durango….When things were good and the energy and desire to write was there, we were busy allowing ourselves to relax and ‘just be’, recharge from all the stress. Much of the other time, we have found ourselves on a roller coaster of emotions, filled with hope and then having it dashed and feeling despondent and so low-ebbed that there was not much energy to communicate. So it is just in the past 24 hours that we have clarity on our course of action and, it feels like a heavy burden has lifted – hence I am writing.
We were in Phoenix where Tom completed his 2nd year Energy medicine Training and passed his competency test. While there, he received some healing work and a dynamic connection was made with a Dr. Of Osteopathy who works with ‘German New Medicine’ that has some very revolutionary approaches to healing cancer. It was w great excitement we headed on to San Diego for more healing work. it was around this time that we decided to cancel the surgery scheduled in Denver on Feb. 12th (yesterday, actually). The procedure they wanted Tom to have, the whipple procedure seemed too grueling and a process that we were not willing to have w/o a second opinion. And we were hearing more about alternative measures that could be used that might actually have the tumor necrotize…………We wanted to explore that more and also got a referral for a non-surgical oncologist at the University of Southern California Cancer Center.
Tom had more Energy Medicine from one of the renowned practitioners in S.D. and then we flew down to southern Baja where we had planned a time for retreat, relaxation, nourishing and renewal. Tom had lost a lot of weight and if we were proceeding w surgery, we wanted to get his weight up….so we had an excuse to enjoy amazingly fresh seafood and endless ceviche, and a regional speciality, ‘Chocolate Clams’, that were some of the most delicious clams we’ve ever enjoyed!!! And another tremendous highlight of our ‘retreat’ was swimming with whale sharks , something that I would encourage on many peoples’ ‘bucket lists.’ We went out in the Bay of La Paz w a young marine biologist and not that far from shore where they had been sighted. The captain of the boat was highly skilled in placing the boat along the whale sharks trajectory and then with wet suits, snorkel and masks, in the water we went and paddling hard and swimming in the direction the biologist told us we attempted encounters with these gentle giants of the sea, vegetarians to boot! It was a number of quick, in the waters and swims to see a tail in the distance, or some bit of brown polka dotted skin and then back out and wait for the next sighting. The last several times, though were absolutely breathtaking with progressively closer encounters until the final one, when it appeared that unless Tom put on the brakes, he was heading for a head-on encounter. it took both our breathes away and had us charged and in delight for the rest of the day. And the bottlenose dolphins that accompanied us on the journey out were plentiful and playful, racing the boat and such beautiful examples of beautiful life!
We enjoyed both the Pacific Coast and the Sea of Cortez side of Baja and found each side having a special and unique beauty. As much of the world, though, it all had grown dramatically from the 18 years ago since I had travelled here ( in a small RV with my huskie wolf as my co-pilot!!) and the prices (except for the seafood) were rather parallel to the states. Still, time in nature and the sea with my beloved, experiencing such natural beauty & resting deeply…….priceless!!!!
We returned to San Diego a week ago and had a wonderful family gathering with Tom’s family at the amazing Torrey Pines Resort…..it was very touching to feel the love and support Cindy, Chris and Ken poured into us both as we shared hard decisions we were facing. During that weekend together, we had received news from the Dr in Phoenix that led us to believe that perhaps Tom was already in a healing phase and surgery would not be necessary. That news created much cause for celebration!
On Monday afternoon (after having our first IKEA experience on Sunday !!!), we were brought back to earth during the meeting w the USC oncologist who emphatically suggested surgery and set up an emergency meeting the following day w his surgeon. Another CAT scan was performed and preliminary evaluation by the surgeon suggested slight growth of the tumor. Yet we felt a greater sense of trust w this surgeon than we had a month ago with the surgeon at the University of Colorado. His patience and willingness to answer questions and the somewhat less invasiveness of his procedure and increased skill with working with blood vessels gave us greater confidence. It seems that in the past 24 hours or so, we have come to terms with Tom having the surgery, realizing that his excellent health and deep commitment to the Energy Work that he has been studying and experiencing on his own body, supports this decision and the follow-up to surgery that can be alternative rather than involving chemo and radiation. In this manner, all is in alignment with Tom’s & mine core beliefs and commitments.
So………….after a stop in Phoenix to get homeopathic and nutritional supports specific to Tom’s body, we are returning to Durango this weekend (and wishes to all of us to celebrate love everyday and often and not have to do it just through Hallmark and chocolates!!), focusing on getting our home more beautiful (having floors sanded this weekend and painting completed) and back in order, connect w loving friends, eat supportive food, do some great hikes,dance and do yoga, touch clients and my dear elderly friends, give a bit more time to the caring family of DURANGO FIRE AND RESCUE,and in 9 or 10 days we will be driving back to L.A. where Tom will be having surgery 2 weeks from today. We will be supported by his family who live nearby and a very skilled team of caring surgeons and oncology staff. We feel your love, support and concern and relish it. We are learning how to love and even flourish (when possible) with uncertainty and insecurity……after all, its an illusion that life is secure, n’est-ce pas? and all we have is our family of friends and family and love if we are offered it and are courageous to choose it.
Namaste, Blessings, Love and Hugs,
Mindy and Tom